


I can't hear you...

by oddball



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Changeover, Introspection, alternate perspective, two Akashis, voices in your head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-13
Updated: 2014-06-13
Packaged: 2018-02-04 13:05:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1780180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oddball/pseuds/oddball
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Akashi hear's voices, some in his head, some outside, some benevolent, some malevolent and all talking about change</p>
            </blockquote>





	I can't hear you...

**Author's Note:**

> This fic rests in the milieu of the latest developments of the manga, which sadden me, a little. Not because I love little Sei-chan, but because I didn't expect his rise and fall in such a short span. So this is midnight reaction fic to that, to what I think is swimming in his head right now...
> 
> Let's hope for the best :)

**"So this is what it comes to. Uncertainty, feeble trepidation and chaos. This is how absolute you are. You and your unshaken fortress is in shambles with just one pounding hit. If you thought that you could stand on the unreachable plinth of perpetual victory, what do you have to say to someone who just jumped that high?  Looks like you were wrong all along. You thought your walls were unbreakable, you thought your mind was unshakable, you thought your fort was impenetrable. One by one, each of your pawns were deemed unusable. And when you had none left, you brought the king out himself. If only Akashi, you would realize, the pieces on a chess board all defend the weakest piece- the king"**

_"No, my world is absolute, I am still..."_

**"Go on. Say it. Say with the conviction you wish you had. Alas! The strong and stable rook has turned against you. Soon the others will too. Your control is fading...Not just over others and the world around you, but over yourself too"**

_"But it makes no sense. I willed myself into the zone. I broke open the door with my bare hands. I have always willed everything around me, people, situations, games even control itself. There is no flaw in my logic. I cannot lose"_

**"And yet here you are, defeated. Staring at your own failing hands. Passing to nothingness, fumbling with the core of your existence. If your will was resting on a precariously balanced unstable tower, made of glass, what use was its height? Someday you will fall and then the pieces will be too many to pick up..."**

_"I will not break. I will not fall. I will..."_

**"You have. And the shards are lodging into your mind, your heart. You are no longer you, Akashi"**

_"I am..."_

**"You are nothing"**

_"I..."_

**"...are a failure"**

_"I have..."_

**"Let everything and everyone, down"**

_"I..."_

**"Accept defeat"**

_"I... have failed...As a captain, a leader, a winner, myself, everyone around me. Nothing is certain anymore. I can fail... No meaning exists in basketball anymore. I have no right to talk or think in something I have failed at. The privilege to be absolute is no longer mine. Not after I have faced defeat. Not after I have learnt what it is like to falter and keep faltering. I can longer..."_

_\----------_

"Akashi-kun, you no longer have to play with the fear of losing. You can now play for the love of basketball" said a third voice

The clamoring and bickering voices inside Akashi's head were barely able to hear the frail but steady voice reaching out to Akashi.

**"Don't listen to that gibberish. Love is a consolation for the weak. For those cannot conquer the game with victory. Love is an emotion. There is nothing certain about it. It is..."** the bolder voice said.

"It is the only thing that makes you go on and on even after failure. It makes you go on even after you can't anymore. Love is Kise-kun passing to his senpai, Midorima-kun having inexplicable trust in Takao-kun to pass the way he does, the spirit that drives Aomine-kun to out-do himself, the feeling that made Murasakibara-kun cry and the only thing that Kagami-kun relies on. Love isn't for the weak, in fact to love the game so much that you play even after you've lost everything, requires inhuman strength" said the third voice again.

_"There's...a game beyond winning?" the frightened, shaken voice asked._

"Yes there is. And we're waiting for you on that side Akashi-kun. All it'll take is for you to hold on. I'm reaching out to you...just hold on"  the stranger's voice added.

Akashi's eyes widened from a narrow, spiteful, scorn, into a bewildered puzzled look. He stood silent, oblivious to the world around him. The scores of people, the resounding voices, the clap-trap and squeak of shoes against the floor and their impending screeching halt, the whistles, the denial and the cheers, nothing reached him.

He stood there, lost, with the expression of a guileless child, left alone in a multitude. The voices in his head not calm, but distant, being replaced by that voice he always heard and knew, but refused to acknowledge. Akashi felt like a deer caught between headlights, not knowing where to dart.

"Akashi-kun, it's okay. It only gets better from here" the soft but sure voice said

"Sei-chan..." he heard the shooting guard of his team calling out from the realm of reality, in a voice different from the rest of his team; a voice of concern and worry, the voice of a mother hen comforting her distressed chicks.

Akashi turned his face towards the mothering voice

"Sei-chan, we're bowing for a good match"

He bowed before the boy before him, in a jerky fashion, still unable to gather himself. The face before him was longingly looking at him, in tears. Akashi was unable to discern those tears.  Those teals eyes and its teal tears, Akashi looked at them long enough before he finally said to himself

"Tetsuya..."

Kuroko's tears dropped over his cheek as he saw the lifelessness drain out of Akashi's hetero-chromatic eyes, like he was waiting for the disparity in Akashi's eyes to fade.

"Thank you for the game!" the teams yelled unanimously.

"You'll reach out and when you do, I'll be there. This winter cup...is no longer war, Akashi-kun"

Akashi heard these parting words from the calming voice that belonged to those teal eyes and watched Kuroko walk out of the court. He looked back into his palm, the sweat on which was glimmering under the strobe lights, only to be joined by a new source of water. As it trickled into his palms from his face, he realized that the eyes shedding these are neither the cold ones of the emperor or the kind but cruel Teiko eyes of the past. These were new eyes, capable of emotion, of fear and maybe, just maybe, the desire to want see himself play without fear.

Maybe, the birth of a third Akashi, the one Kuroko has been awaiting, the one he is reaching out to.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you'll enjoyed this :)


End file.
